June 27, 2011

What do I Think About My Job?

Sonic pretty much sums it up better than anyone ever could @ 0:56.

Like... seriously. Total bullshit.

First off, peep the job description... washes dishes.

So I'm in the back, and all I do all day is wash dishes... unless some bullshit comes up. Bullshit always comes up. From minor bullshit to major bullshit, from fetch quests to extracurricular jobs that I should be getting paid extra for, this shit is a complete mess.

And then like... there is this abundance of hot women at my job. But I hardly get to socialize with them... know why? Too busy in the back washing dishes and/or running dishes to the dish wash machine. Hardly any time to take a break and just chill.

And then, like, the one woman that consistent comes back there to talk is this old fart... and it's like, devastatingly obvious that she's trying to be more than friendly...

And then there's this one chick... I think she likes me... like, when I see her, when she sees me... the smile on this woman's face... I might be reading too much into it, but I can honestly admit that my presence has not lit up a girl's face like that in a looong time.

But, you know... no time to try and capitalize on it.

"Wait, Mark, what about all that shit you were talking about the pussy payments?"

I ain't tryna miss out on beautiful opportunities either. But maybe... this isn't really an opportunity... since, you know, I can hardly get to talk to her... I'm a have to scheme that one out.

Either way... bottom of the barrel down here. I take orders from everyone. "Can I have this?" "Can you get that?" "Do this." "Do that." "Go to the food court and fetch."

You know what? Whatever. Fuck you. Pay me.

I'm going to grind this shit out. Got no choice, actually, but it really is bullshit that is going to make me grow more insane than I already am, slowly but surely. I'm already having sick convos with myself about everything I just typed here and then some... I really wish that someone was back there to hear the comedy I put myself through in order to get through these days... but then again... if the wrong/right person heard what the fuck I was saying, I'd prolly get fired on the spot.

Lol. This is rather dumb for posting this to begin with... surely, the wrong person is going to read this, right?

"Oh well. That's life. Leave a message. As a matter of fact, don't leave a message."

I'm kidding, if you got something to say, then say it.

PS: I imagined this post to be waaaaaay more intense than it actually is. I had a shitload of jokes, one-liners, phrases, and a whole buncha other shit that should have went in the previous paragraphs... but you know... strokes of genius only last but so long.

And then, there are things that wouldn't exactly have fit in those lines...

Like, I legit had a conversation with myself about what I wanted to do with all these plates... had an idea about me one day just losing my mind and launching a bucket worth of plates out of a window and saying, "PLATES MAKE MARK ANGRY" Then the manager comes, see what happens, and says "You're fired." And then I say, "MARK SMASH!" And straight up annihilate the manager.

Also had this legit convo with myself about how this shit really is like high school. Like, you got classes, you got cliques, you got drama at times, the managers are like teachers, and just like there's that one asshole teacher there's that one asshole manager... shit's crazy.

And then I already seen, like 4 people get fired. Promise you I've only been working here for 3 weeks.

This is literally only the tip of the iceberg. I swear, if anyone were to ever just record the shit I say back there... or just chill in the back nonchalantly without me knowing and just listen to me... you'd die of laughter and fear. Combined.

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